Friends Can be a Bad Influence

I had a little relapse myself, squandering the little money I had left. I've read several times on this site that relapsing is part of the recovery process. For me, the relapse is seeming to build more determination. I'm incredibly frustrated and even more sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I've been thinking a lot lately about why I am so self destructive. Gambling the way I do is a manifestation of loneliness, boredom, and depression. What is your's? Facing the negative feelings that I have is making me think about gambling on a deeper level than I previously had. I'm also thinking about how my day to day choices affect my reality, and how that reality could be much different and much, much better. I consider how gambling perpetuates the depression and loneliness and what an oxymoron it is for me to use it to deal with these feelings.

We both have to pick ourselves up and try again, remembering how low we feel now the next time we get the urge to play. I'm telling myself that I got my relapse out of the way and now I can continue to move forward, embracing the ability to decide today not to gamble - also, looking forward to not gambling the next time I have money. We inherently know that gambling is a dead end. Next time you get the urge, realize that. Maybe go buy a new DVD, book, or treat you and a friend to dinner - do whatever you have to do to not gamble that day.

Are your friends a bad influence? If so, do not go to a casino with them! If you do, make your friend agree that neither of you are going to gamble that trip - just chill at the bar and people watch. Remove the negative influence - I'm not saying ditch your friends, but don't put yourself in a compromising position in the name of going out to have fun. If your problem is online, put gamblock on your computer. If you're in Vegas, choose a bar that has an outdoor patio, doesn't have machines, or has seats without video poker.

I have started to carry a pay stub with me. Since the start of 2006, I've made almost double the average annual income in the US, yet I am broke. That is staggering, I wouldn't believe it myself if I didn't see it with my own eyes. I'm carrying my stub and each time I get the urge or think I'll just play a little, I'm going to look at it and consider the thousands I should have and how relaxed I'd feel if I had the money - and how gambling has already taken enough to buy a new car from me this year. That makes me furious! I think I'll take it out on gambling and get angry at it and tell it to f off.

Today will be day 2 for me w/ no gambling. I know as I progress it will become easier and easier and my account will become bigger. Let's make a goal together - no gambling for one week. I know for me, it is much harder to resist when there is only a few days since the last time. We'll gain strength and momentum as the days and weeks pass. Decide not to play knowing that the only way those urges are going to lessen or go away is by going another day.

Be strong and visualize your success.

There's a saying that you

There's a saying that you are who you associate with.