Back on the wagon again!!!

I have been dealing with this addiction since last summer. The guy I was dating at the time lived out of town and so I kept my time occupied at the casino. I had just got done paying off all my minor debts including my car loan when I started gambling intensely. I went from debt free to not so debt free. I kept all of my losses hidden until the day I had to go to court over temporary custody of my child (which went in my favor). I told my mom about the debt I had racked up. My dad is a gambler as well so she knows what its like. Telling her took so much weight off my shoulders. Even though she was extremely dissapointed, she said she would not tell anyone else as long as I got it under control. So I signed myself out of the local casinos and wouldn't it be great if that's where it ended, but it doesn't. I then lost more at the casinos that were hours away from home. So here I am at 8:20A.M. and I am telling everyone that today is the day!!! the buck stops here, right here...... not in a slot, on a scratch ticket, on a table, or on a jackpot powerball. I am so tired of feeling sick to my stomach and worrying about how I'm going to pay for this and that until next payday. Life is not worth this worry or angst. I am glad I found this site, talk about an anchor and shoulder all at the same time. Fortunately I a have a great job and am confident I can pay things off quickly, granted I stay strong and fight the urge. So if anyone has any words of wisdom by all means SHARE!! Thank-you for letting me let this go!

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You deserve better for yourself
Submitted by Bach on Sat, 2006-10-21 16:32.

exvegas1: I just got back from an 8 hour seminar and it felt great. I would have spent this time in the casino if I wasn't in school.

You are right, "Life is not worth this worry or angst." You deserve better for yourself.

Words of wisdom? It's been said millions of times before: "Take it one day at a time." Keep reading what people have done who have faced the same problems you are facing. This will provide some perspective. There are hundreds of stories on this site. I've learned from each one. I've also found that it helps to write out my thoughts.

Talk to you later.


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May you find peace on the
Submitted by denisec on Mon, 2006-10-23 11:40.

May you find peace on the road to recovery. Gamblers anonymous is a good tool if you have it available to you. It's easy to want to stop when all the crap comes rolling down and you have nothing else to lose. When things start getting better and you still aren't gambling that is when life gets better. You don't have to do this alone, there are many of us who have been just where you are and we found a way back to our life. Its awesome to be able to talk to others that have been there and managed to change their lives. May your journey towards recovery be a pleasant one with little obsticles my friend.

Denise C

3 years 7 months and 2 weeks without a bet