I relapsed

Honesty is part of recovery and recovery is a lifelong process... So here it goes: In the last 7 months, I have relapsed 3 times. I did not lose any rent or food money but I lost about $3,000 that should have gone into my wallet or bank account. The relapses were not catotrosphic, thank God. I contributed my relapse to the following reasons: -- I hung out with the wrong people-- negative, destructive people, people who cause stress in my life. They invite me to go gambling, do drugs, chase women. My fault though that I let them influence me. -- The idea of the BIG WIN popped in my head again. Foolish me. Well,

Honesty----------Friday December 16, 2005
09:21 PM EST


Dear Honesty Thank you for sharing about your relapses. It seems as though for many of us compulsive gambler's relapse is a part of recovery. As difficult as it seems at the time, these things are likely to happen to all of us. The great thing from your point of view seems to be your awareness around possibilities of why you relapse. I know from my recovery once I was able to identify triggers, I could do something about putting up roadblocks. I am guessing here but it seems you are willing to do the same thing. Just my thoughts and feelings


Murrayff -----------


I think it's awesome that you quit period. Don't be hard on youself. Don't blame others either for the choices you make. Noone has the power to make you do anything you don't want to do. You have to look back at the times you gave up and threw in the towel. You have to analyze those situations and ask yourself what made you want to go ahead and give up your quitting.

One of the most important lessons for any change you want to make happen is to surround yourself with like minded people. Don't set yourself up to fail. Be around enviroments that support you. I read a book one time that had a quote I will never forget. It said Win or lose the choice is yours. The keyword to me was CHOICE. I have choice in everthing I do. Every time I go back and gamble away everything I have a choice. Every time I sabotage myself financially I have a choice.

Another thing that has helped me is looking into the future. Seeing what could and most probably will happen if I choose to gamble again. I am currently trying to figure out why I sabotage myself financially every time I get a little money together.